Keys to Understanding Other People
Aug 22, 2023
"Communication leads to community, that is, to understanding, intimacy and mutual valuing."
--Rollo May
It's been a process for me to learn to become more relationship oriented. I am a "D" (from the Maxwell Method of DISC Behavrioral Styles) and one of their characteristics is that they have an inherent need to be right. Understanding others? What's that all about?
I found out that if I wanted to be successful and have a positive impact on others, I needed to understand other's perspective. Since leadership is influence, how could I have any at all if it was "my way or the highway?"
Think about what you want from others. Don't you want to be listened to, respected, and understood? An attorney was heard to say, "Half of all controversies and conflicts that arise among people are caused not by difference of opinion or an inability to agree, but by the lack of understanding of one another."
In John Maxwell's book, "Relationships 101," he gives us keys to understanding other people.
1. Everybody wants to be somebody. Everyone wants to be valued by others. Everyone wants to have significance, to believe that their life matters.
2. Nobody cares how much you know until they know how much you care. Once we show that we care about people, the way they feel about us changes. I have found that it isn't always easy to care for other people--especially in the midst of conflict. It's helpful for me during these times to try to remove the emotion and look at the situation factually, like an observer. It is then that I can often see their point of view.
3. Everybody needs somebody. People can accomplish much more together than they can by themselves. To offer to assist someone, even if they don't think they need assistance, can open doors to deepen relationships.
4. Everybody can be somebody when somebody understands and believes in them. I can think back to many times in my life when someone's belief in my abilities helped me to grow into an improved me. Their encouragement and motivation helped me to see my potential.
5. Anybody who helps somebody influences a lot of bodies. When we help one person believe bigger about themselves, we actually help a lot of people. What you give to one person, multiplies into the lives of other people in their sphere of influence.
Understanding these keys, will improve our understanding of others and improve our relationships. Even if we are not relationship oriented, there is hope, believe me. It is a choice to understand people. The ball is in our court. If we want to have better relationships and more positive influence, we will choose to take a step back and try to understand others.
Go and grow,
Jan
I found out that if I wanted to be successful and have a positive impact on others, I needed to understand other's perspective. Since leadership is influence, how could I have any at all if it was "my way or the highway?"
Think about what you want from others. Don't you want to be listened to, respected, and understood? An attorney was heard to say, "Half of all controversies and conflicts that arise among people are caused not by difference of opinion or an inability to agree, but by the lack of understanding of one another."
In John Maxwell's book, "Relationships 101," he gives us keys to understanding other people.
1. Everybody wants to be somebody. Everyone wants to be valued by others. Everyone wants to have significance, to believe that their life matters.
2. Nobody cares how much you know until they know how much you care. Once we show that we care about people, the way they feel about us changes. I have found that it isn't always easy to care for other people--especially in the midst of conflict. It's helpful for me during these times to try to remove the emotion and look at the situation factually, like an observer. It is then that I can often see their point of view.
3. Everybody needs somebody. People can accomplish much more together than they can by themselves. To offer to assist someone, even if they don't think they need assistance, can open doors to deepen relationships.
4. Everybody can be somebody when somebody understands and believes in them. I can think back to many times in my life when someone's belief in my abilities helped me to grow into an improved me. Their encouragement and motivation helped me to see my potential.
5. Anybody who helps somebody influences a lot of bodies. When we help one person believe bigger about themselves, we actually help a lot of people. What you give to one person, multiplies into the lives of other people in their sphere of influence.
Understanding these keys, will improve our understanding of others and improve our relationships. Even if we are not relationship oriented, there is hope, believe me. It is a choice to understand people. The ball is in our court. If we want to have better relationships and more positive influence, we will choose to take a step back and try to understand others.
Go and grow,
Jan